STRAIGHT DIRRRTY

Haha I know you guys can relate to some of these

"Today, while hanging out with some friends, I made a witty observation. Everyone laughed. Later that day while around different people, I told the same joke as if I had never said it before, and got a similar reaction. MLIA."

"Today my dentist asked me if I floss. I haven't flossed in years but I told him I do every day. He told me he could tell. MLIA "

"Today, I decided it would be okay to wear the same clothes I wore yesterday because I will be hanging out with different people. MLIA"

"Today, I found myself looking at 90 photos on facebook of a person I had no clue who it was just because my friend was tagged in one of them. MLIA"

"Today at school I leaned back in my chair and it made a farting noise. I casually did it again so everybody would know it was the chair. MLIA"